Yup, that's right, I've never used a washing machine before. To be fair, I think I have a good reason - being a fox and all. I mean, we never used to wash clothes in the wild. Actually, we didn't even have clothes. Don't worry though, we have these natural fur coats to keep us cosy and covered up.
But when I went to live with Laura, over time I got given some stuff like a coat, scarf, gloves, PJs, and a teddy. So eventually the time came when they needed freshening up...
"Laura! Laura! Laura!" I called, sprawled out in my basket.
There was a doomp, doomp, doomp sound through the wall as someone thudded downstairs and pushed through the door, clutching three mugs and a bottle of milk.
"What is it, Fox?" Laura said, trying to balance the things in her hands.
There was a doomp, doomp, doomp sound through the wall as someone thudded downstairs and pushed through the door, clutching three mugs and a bottle of milk.
"What is it, Fox?" Laura said, trying to balance the things in her hands.
"My clothes need washing - especially teddy, he's gotten a little bit muddy."
"How did he get muddy?" She sighed, leaning against the door.
"We were playing stuck in the mud." I said innocently.
"Well," She said, coming in and sitting on the bed, "I think it's time you learnt how to do this yourself. Do you remember what I taught you?"
I thought back to a day before we left, sat in front of the machine and listening to the instructions, and sketchily remembered:
1. Put clothes in the big bucket thing
2. Put in the soapy stuff
3. Press a button
4. Wait a bit
5. Get the clothes out.
Simple enough. Besides the fact I put too much soap in and didn't shut the door, so we came home to find a room full of water and bubbles. I tried suggesting we kept it that way, as like an indoor pond, but that didn't go down very well.
"How did he get muddy?" She sighed, leaning against the door.
"We were playing stuck in the mud." I said innocently.
"Well," She said, coming in and sitting on the bed, "I think it's time you learnt how to do this yourself. Do you remember what I taught you?"
I thought back to a day before we left, sat in front of the machine and listening to the instructions, and sketchily remembered:
1. Put clothes in the big bucket thing
2. Put in the soapy stuff
3. Press a button
4. Wait a bit
5. Get the clothes out.
Simple enough. Besides the fact I put too much soap in and didn't shut the door, so we came home to find a room full of water and bubbles. I tried suggesting we kept it that way, as like an indoor pond, but that didn't go down very well.
"Um, yeah..." I said, hopping onto all fours and grinning, "...Yeah. Yeah! Yep. No worries. None at all. I'll sort it out!"
I threw my stuff in a bag and plodded off out the house, across the green and over to a building in the street opposite. To keep me company, I had put my headphones on and was listening to some music... And let me tell you, there's no feeling better than an automatic door opening for you whilst listening to a dramatic number from a musical!
I threw my stuff in a bag and plodded off out the house, across the green and over to a building in the street opposite. To keep me company, I had put my headphones on and was listening to some music... And let me tell you, there's no feeling better than an automatic door opening for you whilst listening to a dramatic number from a musical!
'Why yes, washing machines,' I thought, gliding through the self-opening doors, "Fox is here. Fox has arrived. And yes..."
I clutched my bag of clothes and gave a far off look into the distance, singing out the first chorus of the song... "I dreamed a dream in time gone byyyyy... When hope was hiiiiigh..."
With a deep intake of breath and a dramatic sigh, I waltzed myself around the room, drifting in and out of tune and singing the gentle, emotional lines as they twinkled in my headphones: "There was no ransom to be paid, no song unsung, no grape juice untaaaa-sted..."
Until BOOOOM! The drums hit, and the dramatic last chorus hits, full of emotion!
I threw my clothes up into the air and fell to my knees. Throwing my head back, I howled with feeling in the loudest voice I could ever muster: "AND STILL I DREAM HE'LL COME TO MEEEEEEEEEEE! THAT WE WILL LIVE THE YEARS TOGETHERRRRR!"
I was so wrapped up in my performance, I hardly noticed the squeaking of the door. I leapt on top of a washing machine, grabbing the bottle of fabric softener to use as a microphone and belting out the last few notes: "SO DIFFERENT NOW FROM WHAT IT SEEEEEEEEMED, NOW LIFE HAS---"
"Um... Fox?" A voice cut through.
I jolted around to see a bemused looking Laura standing at the door, eyeing the dirty washing that was spread over the floor like a patchwork carpet.
"I.. er... I was just..." I stammered, clutching the fabric softener with the most innocent expression I could muster. "Just..."
Her expression wobbled and wibbled until out crashed a big, hearty: "AHAHAHAHAHA!"
I sniffed. "Well, you could at least be subtle about it. Not even a clap?"
She cleared her throat and marched over to me. With a grin she took hold of my paws and danced with me around the room, singing out: "We dreamed a dream of fresh laundryyyyyyy!" tangoing us through socks and duffle-coats until we were dizzy.
Washing machines turned out to be quite good fun after all! I might clean more often...
I clutched my bag of clothes and gave a far off look into the distance, singing out the first chorus of the song... "I dreamed a dream in time gone byyyyy... When hope was hiiiiigh..."
With a deep intake of breath and a dramatic sigh, I waltzed myself around the room, drifting in and out of tune and singing the gentle, emotional lines as they twinkled in my headphones: "There was no ransom to be paid, no song unsung, no grape juice untaaaa-sted..."
Until BOOOOM! The drums hit, and the dramatic last chorus hits, full of emotion!
I threw my clothes up into the air and fell to my knees. Throwing my head back, I howled with feeling in the loudest voice I could ever muster: "AND STILL I DREAM HE'LL COME TO MEEEEEEEEEEE! THAT WE WILL LIVE THE YEARS TOGETHERRRRR!"
"Um... Fox?" A voice cut through.
I jolted around to see a bemused looking Laura standing at the door, eyeing the dirty washing that was spread over the floor like a patchwork carpet.
"I.. er... I was just..." I stammered, clutching the fabric softener with the most innocent expression I could muster. "Just..."
Her expression wobbled and wibbled until out crashed a big, hearty: "AHAHAHAHAHA!"
I sniffed. "Well, you could at least be subtle about it. Not even a clap?"
She cleared her throat and marched over to me. With a grin she took hold of my paws and danced with me around the room, singing out: "We dreamed a dream of fresh laundryyyyyyy!" tangoing us through socks and duffle-coats until we were dizzy.
Washing machines turned out to be quite good fun after all! I might clean more often...
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